Learning things never taught me nuthin'. And books is the worst.

So, I've not been one to read much fiction, or much else for that matter. This was not something I was proud of. "Hi. My name is Kelly. I'm not a reader." "Hi, Kelly."

The non-reader in me became very aware of what I had been missing one day at Panera when several girlfriends were discussing the books they were reading and wanted to read. Pride and Prejudice. The Fountainhead. War and Peace. (okay, so Pride & Prejudice was the only one really mentioned that I can remember). I had nothing to contribute. I was totally quiet for over 5 minutes. Yikes. I felt embarrassed. After all, I AM a college graduate. I know how to read. So, why wasn't I? The only reason I could come up with was laziness. I love TV and would rather spend my down time watching recorded episodes of Dave or Conan... obviously not challenging too many neurons to fire in the ol' gray matter!

I have a friend who is a lover of good books. To challenge myself, I challenged her to find a good fiction page-turner for me. She placed the everpopular Twilight in my hands. I was excited until I noticed it was 500 pages long. Zoinks! So I buckled up and drove to Forks, Washington with Bella and enjoyed the ride. Me and a packed house of 17 year old girls and other Twilight moms celebrated this book by going to the midnight premier last night. It was pretty good. The experience was fun (even though I was fighting coughing fits the whole time) going with friends who had read the book and hearing the girls gasp when Edward was finally introduced to the screen. You couldn't pay me to go back to high school.

My plan to expand my vocabulary further and keep my brain from turning to mush is to read Tell No One by Harlan Coben next, which has also been recommended. I will probably begin the 2nd Twilight book after that.

I've enjoyed many nights of falling asleep while reading a great story. If you have any suggestions for great fiction or memoirs, please let me know! Until then, I'll be catching up on Dave and Conan and reading like a real bonafide grown up! I'm just sayin'

Little Milestone

The day has finally come and gone: Macy's first day of Pre-K. She was so excited she could hardly go to sleep last night and got up an hour early this morning. She will go to 'school' 5 days a week. I'll try to stay busy, too.

She got to meet 9 new classmates and she loves her new teacher, Mrs. Forrest. On Mondays, she will have music and on Wednesdays she will go to chapel.

I'm curious as to how chapel will go. She already loves church so much and we read a preschooler devotional each night and have conversations about God a lot. Tonight we read about how it is important to do good things so that people will know we love God and He loves them too. Just when I thought she was staring at the huge pink poodle toy on her bed, her little head dropped. I asked her what was wrong and she said, "But I do bad things."

I made sure that she knew that everyone does bad things, and that she does lots of good things too. I guess we better get ready for some serious questions from our little scholar soon. They DO grow up fast-in many ways... I'm just sayin'

Sleep Swimming

Since we moved to Cypress/Houston, Macy has taken to sleep walking. Actually, she had done some of it before, but not to this extent.

The first few nights in the apartment, she would wander around. Sometimes we would hear her and get her, other times we would find her sleeping on the floor beside our bed. One night we noticed a strange light on. I got up to check it and she had opened the refrigerator door and left it open. When she woke up the next morning, she had my grocery list in her hand-the one I had left on the counter by the refrigerator. Interesting.

The scariest episode occurred when Bryan was out of town at a conference and she came into our room in the middle of the night. Aware of the wandering history here, I got up and checked the house to make sure everything was ok when I discovered the door between the apartment and the garage was open. Remember, we went from a 3BR house to a 2BR apartment... the garage is more than full. She could have gotten pretty hurt in an avalanche of cardboard and containers! That one forced us to get locks on the doors up high so she couldn't reach them easily without some type of scaffolding (I wouldn't put it past her).

Since we have been here-about a month-we have gone swimming at least 5 days a week (COME QUICKLY, SCHOOL YEAR, COME QUICKLY!!!). Macy has turned into quite a little swimmer. She is now proudly floatie-free.

Last night around 2am I awoke to a mumbling, confused little girl beside my bed. I picked her up to comfort her for a second. The next thing I know she holds her nose and "splashes" backward onto the bed. After a few minutes of laughter (of which my ailing husband didn't really appreciate), I helped her back to bed to continue her dream of living under the sea.

If we ever find her "sleep cleaning" the apartment, we'll probably wait until she turns off the vacuum cleaner, and then help her find her way back to bed. I'm just sayin'...

My Recent Education

So since you last heard from me, I can say we are doing great. Macy has been okay with the whole transition. She went through a few rough days... that is until 'sassy sauce' was introduced. Sassy Sauce is a few drops of vinegar after a few drops of smart mouth. The smell alone freaked her freak. When she got her first dose (and only dose so far) it was pretty rough. She has not been too sassy since.

Other than sassy sauce, we have been doing well. Bryan has been working 90 mph but still able to spend good time with me and Macy. We have been to the pool at our apartment several times and been eating out a lot. I actually cooked on our stove tonight for the first time. The microwave and paper plates (sorry my green friends. sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do when you can't find half the things that should be in your kitchen) have kept us alive.

I have learned several things recently:

1. Driving from GA to TX with MJ was not as crazy as I expected.

2. Driving away from GA was just as hard as I knew it would be.

3. Driving into TX was quite exciting.

4. Zoila is my hero.

5. Window sills make good night stands to hold phones, glasses, beanie babies.

6. The GA Aquarium is wonderful.

7. The Houston Zoo is hot but good (photo of MJ navigating the zoo for us).

8. The Met is great. Macy and Bryan are loving it-that's all that matters to me at this point. I'm gonna be involved with MOPS soon, MJ will begin LAMB school at the end of August where she will go to Pre-K from 9:00-12:30 and 'stay n play' until 2:30. Mommy likey!

9. I guess I will have to look for a job while MJ is in school. That is good and bad. Good because I like to work and learn new things, bad because I like having the freedom to explore Houston/Cypress, hang out with other moms, watch tivo'd Lettermans... you get the picture.

10. If I have to unpack and flatten one more box, I'll scream.

11. July 4th was fun at the Chambless camp. (in photo, Bryan felt sorry for Riley because she wasn't tall enough to get in the photo, so he improvised)

12. Macy can do a front flip/roll from the side of the pool. She just did it out of the blue today. Cracked me up.

13. Did I mention I missed my Compass fam?!!?!?? I'm just sayin'

"You're the angry one!"

Okay. So back in September Macy brought home a family drawing (red ink) from preschool. The expression on my face in the sketch was quite accurate for that particular phase of her 3 1/2 year old life.

She had drawn many other pictures of us, but none like the one she brought home about 3 weeks ago (purple ink). I said, "Oh, Macy. Who's who?" to which she replied, "Daddy's the fun, happy one, I'm the small one and you are the angry one."

Nice.

I guess the parent who gives the most time-outs and says, "Stop!" and "Now, Macy" ends up being thought of as 'the angry one.' She could tell I didn't want to be the angry one, so she drew a happy mommy to put over the angry one (sketch on notebook paper below).

That was sweet of her. But that doesn't mean I'm looking forward to the next family portrait. I'm just sayin'

Say Cheeeeth!

I guess it was just a matter of time. Macy had her first visit to the E.R. last night. Before you read on.... she's ok. If she were not, I probably wouldn't be blogging right now.

Here's what happened...
We were enjoying having Small Group at Heidi and Brandon's. The weather was nice, so the kids were playing outside for a few minutes. On their way back to the play room, Macy's mouth got up close and personal with the corner of their coffee table-at high speed. She bounced off of it right into Bryan's arms. I was in the restroom at the time but once I heard the thud and screaming, I knew it was Mace.

By the time I got to her, Bryan had her in the kitchen. Blood was all over her mouth and hands, and Bryan. As we looked closer once the crying slowed down, we saw the cut on her face just below her bottom lip. Then I saw that 3 of her top/front teeth were bent back in her gum at a 45 degree angle. We got in the car and got to the E.R. rather swiftly (if you know Bryan, you know that it was a little quicker than "swiftly").

Everyone there was great, better than we expected. The doctor moved her teeth back into place. She did not like that very much. She was so brave and still for her 2 stitches. She was the ideal patient, until we got home of course. But we have spoiled her with anything she wants that she can suck up a straw and any story and any toy and any movie... you get the picture.

The dentist that we visited this morning said we have to come back Thursday to get one of the teeth pulled. She will have a cute little smile until her permanent teeth come in, in only 3 years or so. Her permanent teeth are fine according to the Xray. I asked if they could put a little false tooth there, you know, Flava Flav style, but she said no dice. The fake baby teeth usually look bad and cause a lot of plaque build up on the other teeth they are anchored to.

So now, her lips are swollen and hamburgered and her mouth hurts a little. We are keeping Motrin in her to reduce the swelling. I think the number of jello and pudding cups in our kitchen is at an all-time high.

These pictures are of days one (right after we got home from the E.R.) and two (silly bath time). She is a trooper and sweetie. Her smile will be a little different for a while, at least for a 4-year-old. I do have to say her little lisp is cute. I feel so bad for her. She said she was scared that her school friends would think her smile wasn't pretty.... at 4... how can all that start so soon? All I know is that if I hear on ONE kid giving her a hard time, Bryan will have to hold me back from kicking a little preschool bootie. I'm justht thayin'

Far More Than Rubies

To go even higher on the "Great Dads of the World" list, Bryan got up around 4:15am and held a spot in line for Champions for Children, a wonderful Pre-K program. The doors opened at 8am. Bryan was first in line and guaranteed one of the two spots available for the Macy to attend this school in the Fall. Oh, did I mention the spot he secured for her is FREE (thank you state funding!)!!???!? This means free school/childcare for Macy 5 days a week from 8am-2:30pm.

Yeah me! This means I will be able to get a job. I have missed working outside the home, but I'm sure I will miss Mace much more in the coming school year as her brain grows (barring any paste eating episodes).

Thanks, Babe, for loving your little girl that much especially in a world where some dads won't even get off of the couch for their kids. You are teaching her she is worth far more than rubies.

Other Stuff
Big Bargain: We went to a huge book sale this morning put on by the local library. All the books you can put into a paper grocery bag for $7. 43 books for $14 - not bad!

Possible New Addiction: I got my first massage yesterday. We have a friend who is attending school to become a massage therapist and she needed to get some more hours in so, bless my heart, I helped her out. She was born to do this. It was wonderful. That new job in the Fall can't get here fast enough. I would love to do this once a month at least.

Household Hint: To keep shirts from slipping off of their hangers, run a bead of hot glue along the edge of the shoulder area of the hanger. Allow the glue to dry. Sorry I felt that necessary to include. I'm just sayin'.

Wild Girl

Like most other parents, Bryan and I fully believe Macy Jane is the most amazing kid ever (in spite behavior mentioned in previous postings). She also made a pretty cute cowgirl for Wild West week at her preschool.

Also….

Oscar Review: Jon Stewart was great. Only saw one of the movies up for best picture, Juno, and loved it. Looking forward to seeing all of the others. Javier Bardem (aka Denny from Grey’s) freaked my freak with his real dialect. After watching Grey’s, who knew? He is amazing.

Word Currently Stuck in My Head: Schlumpadinka (thanks Oprah!)

Latest Road Rage/Driving Pet Peeve: Come on, people. Just because you are at a 4-way stop doesn’t mean you have to wait for the car a half a mile away to get to the intersection and stop for you to go. I’m talking to you seniors!

I’m just sayin’.

Coming Soon: Searching for Bobby Flay

“Every journey begins with a single move.”

Ok, so maybe that is the tag line for Searching for Bobby Fischer. Fischer. Flay. Whatever.

Anyway, when Bryan and I went to NYC a couple of years ago, we ate at MESA Grill, one of Bobby Flay’s restaurants. It was wonderful. One of the best dining experiences I’ve ever had. I ordered a chicken dish that was loaded with spices aptly named “12 Spice Chicken.”

In our recent quest for healthier living, I have been perusing a few Cooking Light magazines and found a great recipe, tasting similar to the one mentioned above, but not as many ingredients. Here goes:

Coat chicken with the following:
2 tsp garlic powder
2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp salt
1 tsp ground cumin
1 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp ground red pepper

Grill or broil chicken. Then cover chicken with 6 tbsp honey and 2 tsp cider vinegar that have been mixed together and place back on grill/under broiler for one minute. Yum!

Flay is no Colonel Sanders. I’ll figure out the other spices soon and let you know. Until then, “6 Spice Chicken” will have to do. I’m just sayin’.

Paging Dr. Dobson...

Okay. I never claimed to be the most BabyWise parent, but I'm not the biggest BabyFool either, so what happened here!?!?!?

A few nights ago, Bryan and I went through the usual bedtime routine with Macy: bath, dry hair, brush teeth, read story, say prayers, tuck in, say goodnight, leave the room with a sweet, "I love you. Sleep tight."

I guess the tucked in one decided that it would be fun to have a stand off to the nth degree with sweet, caring, loving Mommy & Daddy. Let the battle (that felt more like the 100-years War) begin!

Here she came, tiptoeing out of her room and around the corner to the living room, right after I had foolishly taken a NyQuil. What was I thinking!?! How dare I expect a good nights rest when the darling who was supposed to be in sweet slumber wanted to knee me in the parental you-know-whats?

Since spankings, time-outs and removing privileges were currently, how shall we say, not working so well, we decided to give her 2 options: 1. go sleep in her bed. 2. stand in the middle of the living room until she decided #1 was the best option. Again, what were we thinking?!?!? After crossing her arms and announcing she was not going to bed (with full on Shanehneh snaps and sass) and approximately 80 minutes of head bobbing, Bryan giggling and whispering, "She would win a cool million on Survivor!" and me nodding off (remember the NyQuil move?) she was finally carried off to peaceful rest in her bed where she collapsed. Finally. Her two miserable parents also found themselves collapsing only after a small bout of laughing and crying at the same time.

So, now we fear the future. She could either be the strongest leader a Fortune 500 company or our country has ever seen, or, well, I don't even want to think about it. Either way, she will be the most stubborn person I have ever known.

She is one of a kind and we love her dearly. We just pray we learn the best way to train her up in the way SHE should go. All kids are different and this one is no exception.

She stayed in her bed until about 5:30 am, which was a victory for us considering she normally trots across the house about 1:00 am to curl up in her sleeping bag in the floor of our room.

Sweet "victory"? We are saying so, just to make ourselves feel better. Until the next battle royale, we must get our rest.

Okay! I give in!

Since most everyone in the free world seems to be blogging, I might as well. Besides, I have several thoughts a day that are parenthetically captioned with, “That would be a good blog entry... if I had one.”

I will admit, I am not a genius when it comes to the terminology I am supposed to be using on the internets, so forgive me in advance. I may ask you to download something you should upload. Who knows?

I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to all of you whom I’ve made fun of for blogging saying (or thinking) things like, “Do you really think people are THAT interested in what you have to say about life that you have to post it for the whole world to see?” I take it back. Even if no one ever reads my blog, it will be a good way for me to put some thoughts down (good excuse for me wanting to be liked-but don’t tell anyone!).

This first posting is dedicated to the Mark and Macy Bricker. May you enjoy your birthday shrimp and pasta!

So here goes!